I love to organize, pull things out of a drawer or closet, toss out the unnecessary and reposition everything back in a neat, orderly fashion. I know, I’m weird. I’ve been this way since I can remember. As a little girl I kept my toys, dolls, and room neat as a pin without my mother telling me to. She used to say I was like my Aunt Dottie (Doris Marie Rayhill), a kindred spirit when it came to having things in their place.
I believe I have a natural bent toward being organized. Somewhere in the dark recesses of my mother’s womb as I was being formed in secret, there was a strong gene, part of my DNA, that stood up and shouted, come on now, let’s get organized. It will be fun!
Just recently, I was trying to find something in the cabinet under the bathroom sink. I had to pull out a few things and soon the contents of the cabinet were all out and I was organizing! When it all gets put back, I get a rush akin to a runner finishing a race. I start looking for a closet or drawer to go through next.
With that in mind, you might not guess I am also a pack rat. I know, I’m weird. I keep things that have a memory attached to it or something I think I just might need in the future (hopefully I can find it then). The pack rat in me wars with the organizer in me. What am I to do with all the stuff I keep keeping? Where can I put it, out of sight, still keep it orderly, and be able to retrieve it later? That is the dilemma.
I have determined I have too much stuff. My stuff is taking too much of my time. Because, of course, I have to keep finding neat, orderly places for it all. It’s time to let go, to turn loose. I have the urge to purge. I’m in the mood to remove.
Simplify! That’s it, I need to simplify. But wait. I have company coming next week. No time to pull out, to review the stuff and decide what to keep and what to discard. I’ll just stuff it back in the closet until a more convenient time (whenever that is).
There are times the Lord speaks to me to discard the stuff that has cluttered my heart and my attention. He has dealt with me about bitterness and unforgiveness. I’ve had to write a letter and apologize for something I did years ago, seeking someone else’s forgiveness. Sometimes, I want to nudge that still small Voice back into the closet of my heart and wait for a more convenient time. After all, I have things to do and places to go. But that Voice is insistent, tender but demanding. I have to pay attention or my relationship with Him suffers. It is not that He would draw away from me. Rather, it would be me turning my heart from Him in rebellion and disobedience if I do not heed the convicting whisper of the Holy Spirit.
Organizing my life, my heart is too much work. I need the help of a Professional.
Lord, create in me a clean heart. You who organized the entire universe to operate in an orderly and wonderous fashion, I invite you into every room and closet of my inner-most being. Go into the dark corners and shine Your light. Make known to me what should be dealt with, what is displeasing to You. Make a clean sweep so that Your glory can shine brightly to a world needing to see Jesus.